I am sooooooo proud, I am now getting hate mail (sorta), I wanted to share with you the letters, and my ass-holeish response: Names have been changed to keep me from having to kill someone who tries to sue me.

LETTER: #1

alk mem <FUCKTHIS GUY@yahoo.com> wrote:

cute little site!

this is why i am glad the insurgents are getting your goat. you make money off the gung ho wannabeez......

and you yourself feel self-righteously in charge of the situation! super idea!

you little patriots are so so CUTE! kisses,

us

ASS-HOLEISH Response

Thanks for thinking my site is cute, I think your sister is cute too, but I did not tell you that because your mom might get mad, and stop letting me fuck her in the ass.

No insurgent has gotten my goat - I still have him, his name is Steve.

As so far I have made $87.50 off of "gung ho wannabeez......" and $0.00 off of "pussy ass fags," but I did get one e-mail complimenting the cuteness of my site.

You are correct, I do feel self-righteous, but not in charge, we have generals for that shit.

Over all, you can feel happy that your letter has made a difference, I am going to shut my site down, and butt-fuck-ducks all day - if you don't mind me moving in on your hobbies.

Love,

Mike

PS: You know deep-down you want to kill people, it's OK, we all do.

He writes back!

alk mem <FUCKTHISGUY@yahoo.com> wrote:

goddess bless you and your guns!

happy yule!

I had to tell him something in response....

Obviously you are not from around here, because who the fuck says "yule"?

Thank you for blessing me, and my guns - but we do not need blessing, we have Rangers, Delta, Force Recon, Seals, Cooks, and Infantry; they provide all the faith we need.

I bet every of the little bastards who got smoked by one of the above groups asked for some sort of blessing before they were killed.

Blessing works!

Love ya,

Mike

Letter #2

OK, so i admit, Violentpatriot.com is trying to be a business of some sort - I think i have made about $200 bucks by now. Thank you to all that have supported me! So i try to do a little marketing, nothing big, I pay this guy to get me hits... but he won't take my money! See why:

The marketing fucks:

Hello,

We will not to approve the campaign below in any of our categories for several reasons including the hate and vulgar language present.

If you prefer, we can delete the campaign and put the credits into your account for future use, or can refund your payment.....just let us know.

Shahab Akhavan

Letter #3

Kirk Jay <FUCKTHISGUY@hotmail.com> wrote:

Ok first off you are sick, just what kind of people are you catering to? Why do you think it is ok to make fun of others that are different. I bet your a white christen male living on some ranch always talking about how the brown people are ruining the country well get with it man it a 2006 and not every one wants your poison shoved down there throat.

ASS-HOLEISH Response

Ok, First off, you are a fag.

I am not catering to anyone, I am not a caterer, I sell shirts and stuff, caterer's bring food to parties.

I think it is ok to make fun of people who are different because i am on the side that is right, you know that you made fun of the fat kid in school, and this is some pathetic attempt at retribution so you can sleep at night.

So, your taking bets? I bet that you are a pathetic Lycra wearing motherfucker that never amounted to anything on your own, never had a hard days work in your life, and somehow identifies with the little bastards that kill our troops. Further I bet that you drink a non-fat, light foam, soy, sugar-free Carmel fuckyouintheass from star bucks every day - which you would not be able to do if our military was not what it is; enjoy your freedom benefits in ignorance.

By the way, i am not Christian, and I don't live on a ranch, but why are you so racist to those who do?

Looks like I won the bets.

Don't want my "poison?" don't type www.violentpatriot.com into your web browser. Idiot.

Want my poison? I'll send you a free shirt to wear at your living with anal leakage meetings.

VP

Letter #4

Pole c smoker <Pole_c_smoker@assmonkey.com> wrote:

Way to go disgracing the service of the military with your ignorance.

NOTICE: Due to Presidential Executive Orders, the National Security Agency may have read this email without warning, warrant, or notice. They may do this without any judicial or legislative oversight. You have no recourse nor protection save to call for the impeachment of the current President.

Funny story to go with this:

This guy pissed me off for some reason, so I got a fugitive recovery buddy of mine to trace down all of his info. I got his name, address, a few pictures, phone number, and some gay-ass club associations that he belongs to. Side note, he never wrote back.

Ass-Holeish Response

Hi <His Real Name>

How am I disgracing the military? My site, and everything in it is a tribute to those who serve.

And What the fuck is up with your notice calling for impeachment of the President?

And what the fuck is the The <Location Removed> Vegan Meet up Group? do you get together and talk about only eating cock-meat?

Next time you want to talk shit about something you have no idea about, get someone to kick you in the face to change your mind.

You obviously have not served in the military, and only know what your other carrot eating assholes have told you, you ignorant fuck.

I know what you look like, a pole-smoking fag with a cell-phone; something like this:

<His Real Picture>

Love ya,

Write back if you have balls,

Mike

LETTER: #5

Yea, I get allot of Spam, I mean fucking tons of the shit, and I delete it all, no problem. For some reason I saw this, and decided to respond. I know its just going to make more now that they confirmed my address is active, but fuck, this is too frickin funny.

Spam Fuckers

From: a-aasen@ace-micro.com

Subject: Hallo!

Date: July 6, 2007 4:30:08 PM PDT

To: mike@violentpatriot.com

Reply-To: a-aasen@ace-micro.com

Hello! I am tired this afternoon. I am nice girl that would like to chat with you. Email me at cmiw@docmaildirect.info only. Hope you wanna see my pics.

ASSHOLE Response

Are you fucking kidding me?

Hallo? C’mon, who wrote this fucking spam letter? If you want me to respond, at least get tricky like some of those other assholes who say I’m an instant winner, you’re a long lost friend I somehow forgot about, or promise the greatest collection of nude lesbian animal fetish fisting midget paraplegic burn victim porn ever assembled; because if you have that, im fucking clicking. Twice.

Now, lets examine the first part of your offer: “I am tired this afternoon.”

Neither I, nor no one else gives a fuck your tired; you would have better results with:

“I am a dirty slut who craves monster cock the size of a dinosaur; or whatever you have. Really, this is not a joke, I am sitting in your driveway, all you have to do is click and I’ll come blow you and all your friends, I promise.”

Now the second part: “I am nice girl that would like to chat with you.”

Who the fuck chats with nice girls that want to show me their pics that say Hallo?

Fucking no one, that’s who.

Look here maildirect.info retards, this sort of shit may have worked at the Internets inception, but you really need to get with the times. The only thing that causes people to respond to auto E-mails such as this is two things:

1. Promises of depraved shit that you cannot find anywhere else (which is pretty fucking rare these days – see my suggestion at the top of the letter.)

2. Fooling me – not going to happen chump, stick to tip #1.

Kindest regards,

Mike