I am now going to start reviewing shit. I while ago, I figured that my opinion was the closest thing to fact and it is my duty to share these facts with the rest of humanity

Review #1

Thing Reviewed: Me

Review: The only perfect thing on earth. Period.

Review #2

Thing Reviewed: This picture:

Review: This is one of the greatest pictures on earth, I found it on the bad ass site: http://www.rickhindererknives.com Who will be having some of there quality products reviewd at some point.

Review #3

Thing Reviewed: Civilian Time

Review: Short answer, civilian time sucks. Lets look at all the data; first, what the fuck is this a.m., p.m. bullshit? – fuck meridians. I should not have to divide the day into two sets; it’s already divided up enough. With military time, you always know where you stand; 1800 is the 18th hour of the day, fucking genius! Now the colon, why do we have to divide the numbers up in two sections? I am smart enough to figure out which are the minutes, and which are the hours. Humans have fucking opposable thumb for fucks sake, we invented space travel, pacemakers, yogurt, porn, and those new-fangled horseless carriages; we can separate four numbers into two groups. Long answer, fuck you civilian time, you fucking blow!

Review #4

Thing Reviewed: Lightfighter Forums ( http://lightfighter.net/eve/forums )

Review: Lightfighter forums are frickin cool! great place to get good intel, funny jokes, trade bad ass gear, and learn from smart folks. There is it's fair share of bullshit, but overall, good folks. Check it out today!

Review #5

Thing Reviewed: Homelessness

Review: I hate it, here is the solution:

Homelessness is a pandemic that affects every major city in the United States. There are literally tens of thousands of people who live on the street. These people rarely have jobs, contribute to society, or do anything of value. They beg for money, act a bit crazy, and all around just bug me. My solution is a multi-faceted solution that will do numerous things, including:

∑ Get the homeless off the street

∑ Provide valuable services to the community

∑ Educate / Train the homeless for future professions

∑ Strongly encourage a less “urban outdoorsman” lifestyle for everyone

∑ Pay for itself

Lets hit all the benefits in order.

Get the homeless off the street. Build or convert current shelters to a functional, yet basic outline, much akin to old military barracks, rows of bunks with community facilities. The idea here is function over comfort – we do not want these people to be comfortable, we want them off the street, and not bugging me.

Provide valuable services to the community. The cost of staying in a shelter is 6 hours of labor, per day, 7 days a week, working on community services projects. This includes; digging ditches, building roadways, erecting infrastructure, painting over graffiti, picking up trash, ETC. These jobs will suck, allot, the goal is to have someone do the shit I don’t want to, and encourage them to “move on.” For this work, each person will be paid $18.00 a day. This will allow them to buy food, (we are not feeding the fuckers too,) clothes, and other essentials. They will get an hour break to get ready for the second part of their daily job, which is look for a job, for 2 hours. They are not allowed in the shelter during this time, and must either go to one job interview, or fill out 2 applications; failure to do so will lead to them losing their $18.00 daily rate. Anyone found trying to “cheat” the system by faking interview/applications, or purposely sabotaging the hiring process for themselves (so they do not get hired) will be executed by dismemberment.

Educate / Train the homeless for future professions. At night, these shelters will host training/education classes for anyone who wishes to attend. Its not that I hate homeless people, I hate unproductive useless people. These classes will be, in part, sponsored by local business that could benefit from this potential pool of employees.

Strongly encourage a less “urban outdoorsman” lifestyle for everyone. Two weeks after the start of this program, a secondary program will begin (staffed by those in other areas of local government that used to have to deal with the homeless.) At any time that someone is deemed a homeless pain in the ass, they will be doused with a whole can of lighter fluid, and set on fire. This will encourage others to get a useful existence, remove the problem, without high costs of administration/removal, and provide heat in the winter.

Pay for itself. As noted, all staff on this project will be volunteers, or current government staff, displaced by the removal of the homelessness problem. Sponsorship from businesses will supplement some of the costs, in the form of sponsorship and advertising (sponsoring the classes, naming of shelters on their behalf, etc; advertisement in the form of matchbooks.) The main contribution to the costs of the program is the labor itself. In addition to government entities, any company can use people in the program, for any task, up to and including medical testing, at the cost of $6.00 an hour; paid directly to the programs administration.